"If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them."
~ Henry David Thoreau
According to Mr. Henry David Thoreau, castle building in the air is okay - natural even - but the step most people forget to take is to make a path to reach that castle. A path I hope I am currently making. I know there’s no guarantee that the castle I have made right now is the castle I will end up reaching, but I am assured that I will reach a castle at the end of my path and that it will be the best fit for me - and no one else.
That being said, it doesn’t mean that I am not nervous about graduation. Why? Because honestly, I don’t think I will complete all of my coursework on time. I know compared to others I have it relatively easy, but the situation I am in right now is probably the worst situation I have ever maneuvered myself into, and I have been in a lot of bad situations - I just knew how to get out of them better. Right now, I can say, without lying, that there are probably three things holding me back - all of them doable of course, but time consuming.
The first of which pertains to my Senior Project and Exit Interview. I have not done my Job Shadow. I know, I know, I should have done it beforehand, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have a plan. But before I get into “The Plan” let us backtrack for a little bit. I want to be a lawyer. Therefore, I should Job Shadow a lawyer. Logical, right? But it wasn’t that easy. Unfortunately. Since the beginning of Senior Year, okay maybe not that early, but since the beginning of November 2015, I had been trying to contact various lawyers to schedule a shadowing with them. I even contacted a few lawyers who practiced in areas I had no intention of touching with a twelve foot long pole. The response? Well, sometimes there was no response at all, a “Mr/Ms. So-and-So will get back to go with their answer” and there would be no getting back, or the person I would have shadowed creeped me out. Period. I know I shouldn’t be quick to make judgements based on a phone conversation, but the couple that did get back to me with possible dates, I did not feel comfortable spending possibly a whole working day with. Then, thankfully, I was able to get in contact with an estate planner. He seemed nice, but before he could give me a solid answer on whether I could do a Job Shadow in his firm, he requested an interview with his head paralegal. The interview went well and then came the problem of setting a date. The paralegal said that her boss didn’t want me missing any school in regards to the Job Shadow and since January and February was a lull time for them, Spring Break would work best for them and I would be able to see the whole firm in action. Considering that I do have a date, everything seems fine and dandy, right? But the day for my Job Shadow is a cutting it a little too close to the deadline for my liking. I mean, what if they cancel on me? What if I can’t complete all of the necessary paperwork on time? What if’s, what if’s, and some more what if’s. They’re never-ending in this situation. So many things could go out of plan. But the only thing I can do right now is be optimistic. Right?
The second and third of my worries are directly coursework related. Art and AP Biology. I love both of these classes. However, both of these classes are also the bane of my existence right now - pun not intended. Sorry, batman reference. Saying “bane” might be a little bit of a stretch though, since it’s more like they are probably the cause of the minor periods of stress that I endure. In my Advanced Art class, for example, I know I am capable of completing all of the assignments, it just takes me longer to do them. I’m not the best of artists, but if I concentrate hard enough, I can produce good quality artwork. However, lately I haven’t been able to concentrate all that well what with all of the applications and scholarships, so I have a few incomplete art projects in my portfolio right now. And they are the ones that I have probably done my best on. Pathetic really. In regards to AP Biology - I… hate… bookwork!!!! I mean, I will do it and put my best effort in it, but why do we have to read information that is already shared with us in class? Okay, maybe I’m not being totally fair here - some of the things I have had to read, Mr. Coles does not have time to cover in class, and I understand that, but the other things? They’re all review. I know it’s important to regularly review everything we’ve learning in preparation for the AP Exam - and I will do it… eventually - but that doesn’t mean I have to be particularly happy about it. So why am I freaking out about possibly not passing these classes? That one of these days, when it matters the most, I won’t make the final-there’s-no-going-back deadlines.
Other than those three things, I’m all for graduating. After all, graduating means that I am one step closer to my castle. I just hope it isn’t in shambles when I reach it. Or not what I wanted. Or… There’s a lot of “or’s” here, too - sadly. But we all have to work with what we’ve got, right? So work I shall and reach my castle I shall, regardless of, well everything.
~ Henry David Thoreau
According to Mr. Henry David Thoreau, castle building in the air is okay - natural even - but the step most people forget to take is to make a path to reach that castle. A path I hope I am currently making. I know there’s no guarantee that the castle I have made right now is the castle I will end up reaching, but I am assured that I will reach a castle at the end of my path and that it will be the best fit for me - and no one else.
That being said, it doesn’t mean that I am not nervous about graduation. Why? Because honestly, I don’t think I will complete all of my coursework on time. I know compared to others I have it relatively easy, but the situation I am in right now is probably the worst situation I have ever maneuvered myself into, and I have been in a lot of bad situations - I just knew how to get out of them better. Right now, I can say, without lying, that there are probably three things holding me back - all of them doable of course, but time consuming.
The first of which pertains to my Senior Project and Exit Interview. I have not done my Job Shadow. I know, I know, I should have done it beforehand, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have a plan. But before I get into “The Plan” let us backtrack for a little bit. I want to be a lawyer. Therefore, I should Job Shadow a lawyer. Logical, right? But it wasn’t that easy. Unfortunately. Since the beginning of Senior Year, okay maybe not that early, but since the beginning of November 2015, I had been trying to contact various lawyers to schedule a shadowing with them. I even contacted a few lawyers who practiced in areas I had no intention of touching with a twelve foot long pole. The response? Well, sometimes there was no response at all, a “Mr/Ms. So-and-So will get back to go with their answer” and there would be no getting back, or the person I would have shadowed creeped me out. Period. I know I shouldn’t be quick to make judgements based on a phone conversation, but the couple that did get back to me with possible dates, I did not feel comfortable spending possibly a whole working day with. Then, thankfully, I was able to get in contact with an estate planner. He seemed nice, but before he could give me a solid answer on whether I could do a Job Shadow in his firm, he requested an interview with his head paralegal. The interview went well and then came the problem of setting a date. The paralegal said that her boss didn’t want me missing any school in regards to the Job Shadow and since January and February was a lull time for them, Spring Break would work best for them and I would be able to see the whole firm in action. Considering that I do have a date, everything seems fine and dandy, right? But the day for my Job Shadow is a cutting it a little too close to the deadline for my liking. I mean, what if they cancel on me? What if I can’t complete all of the necessary paperwork on time? What if’s, what if’s, and some more what if’s. They’re never-ending in this situation. So many things could go out of plan. But the only thing I can do right now is be optimistic. Right?
The second and third of my worries are directly coursework related. Art and AP Biology. I love both of these classes. However, both of these classes are also the bane of my existence right now - pun not intended. Sorry, batman reference. Saying “bane” might be a little bit of a stretch though, since it’s more like they are probably the cause of the minor periods of stress that I endure. In my Advanced Art class, for example, I know I am capable of completing all of the assignments, it just takes me longer to do them. I’m not the best of artists, but if I concentrate hard enough, I can produce good quality artwork. However, lately I haven’t been able to concentrate all that well what with all of the applications and scholarships, so I have a few incomplete art projects in my portfolio right now. And they are the ones that I have probably done my best on. Pathetic really. In regards to AP Biology - I… hate… bookwork!!!! I mean, I will do it and put my best effort in it, but why do we have to read information that is already shared with us in class? Okay, maybe I’m not being totally fair here - some of the things I have had to read, Mr. Coles does not have time to cover in class, and I understand that, but the other things? They’re all review. I know it’s important to regularly review everything we’ve learning in preparation for the AP Exam - and I will do it… eventually - but that doesn’t mean I have to be particularly happy about it. So why am I freaking out about possibly not passing these classes? That one of these days, when it matters the most, I won’t make the final-there’s-no-going-back deadlines.
Other than those three things, I’m all for graduating. After all, graduating means that I am one step closer to my castle. I just hope it isn’t in shambles when I reach it. Or not what I wanted. Or… There’s a lot of “or’s” here, too - sadly. But we all have to work with what we’ve got, right? So work I shall and reach my castle I shall, regardless of, well everything.